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Honor & Memorial · 99 words

Memorial Honorifics and Verbs

The vocabulary of reverence — for obituaries, tributes, eulogies, and family histories.

When to use this bank

Reach for these words when writing memorial biographies, obituaries, or tributes. The rule is restraint: a memorial biography that uses one or two of these well is more moving than one that uses many.

When not to use it

Avoid clichés that have been worn smooth by overuse ('lost his battle with', 'gone too soon'). Avoid metaphors of journey, sleep, or angels unless the family has explicitly requested that register.

The vocabulary

Organized into 6 groups. Each group has its own guidance.

Verbs of life

20 words

Verbs that describe what the person did with their time. Specific and active.

livedworkedservedtaughtraisedtendedkeptlovedcared forbuiltplantedwrotemadeledplayedsangstudiedfought forstood withbefriended

Verbs of departure

11 words

Verbs that name the death. Choose the register that matches the family and the publication.

diedpassed awaypasseddeparted this liferestedwas called hometransitionedleft usis at peacefell asleep in the Lordentered into eternal rest

Honorifics and titles

21 words

Titles and descriptors that signal the standing of the person within their community.

beloveddevotedlongtimehonoredrespectedcherishedtreasuredmuch-lovedesteemeddearlongest-servingfoundingfounding membereldermatriarchpatriarchgodfathergodmothermentorteacherneighbor

Relationship descriptors

25 words

For 'survived by' lines and family acknowledgements.

husbandwifespousepartnersondaughterchildstepchildfathermotherparentgrandfathergrandmothergrandparentgreat-grandparentbrothersistersiblingin-lawgodchildniecenephewcousinuncleaunt

Closing constructions

12 words

Phrases that close a memorial biography with dignity.

is survived byleaves behindis remembered byis mourned byin lieu of flowersdonations may be directed toa memorial service will be helda private interment will followthe family will receive friendsthe family asks thatin his memoryin her memory

Phrases to avoid

10 words

Cliché phrasing that subtracts dignity. Cut these.

lost his battle withlost her battle withgone too soonin a better placeearned his angel wingsthe heavens gained an angelcalled home to gloryshuffled off this mortal coilpassed into the great beyondsaluted his last reveille

Where these words pair well

Newspaper obituary

Lead with full name, dates, place. Use one 'Verbs of departure' phrase calibrated to family religion and publication. Use 'Verbs of life' to fill the body.

Funeral program

Use restrained 'Honorifics' once, not in every line. 'Beloved father of three' is stronger than 'beloved father of three beloved children'.

Family history archive

Use full names of relationships in 'survived by' for the historical record — future descendants will want to know who Aunt Mae was.

Before and after

What this bank looks like applied to a single sentence.

Before

It is with great sadness that we announce the passing of John Smith, who lost his courageous battle with cancer and is now in a better place, having earned his angel wings on October 14.

After

John Smith of Bristol, Vermont, died at home on October 14, 2024, surrounded by family. He was sixty-eight. John lived in Bristol for forty-one years, worked as the town's water and sewer commissioner from 1989 until his retirement in 2017, and is survived by his wife Marian and their three children.